"I must help others"

Helpers are warm, concerned, nurturing, and sensitive to other people's needs.

How to Get Along with Me

• Tell me that you appreciate me. Be specific.
• Share fun times with me.
• Take an interest in my problems, though I will probably try to focus on yours.
• Let me know that I am important and special to you.
• Be gentle if you decide to criticize me.

In Intimate Relationships

• Reassure me that I am intersting to you.
• Reassure me often that you love me.
• Tell me I'm attractive and that you're glad to be seen with me.

What I Like About Being a Two

• being able to relate easily to people and to make friends
• knowing what people need and being able to make their lives better
• being generous, caring, and warm
• being sensitive to and perceptive about others' feelings
• being enthusiastic and fun-loving, and having a good sense of humor

What's Hard About Being a Two

• not being able to say no
• having low self-esteem
• feeling drained from overdoing for others
• not doing things I really like to do for myself for fear of being selfish
• criticizing myself for not feeling as loving as I think I should
• being upset that others don't tune in to me as much as I tume in to them
• working so hard to be tactful and considerate that I suppress my real feelings

Twos as Children Often

• are very sensitive to disapproval and criticism
• try hard to please their parents by being helpful and understanding
• are outwardly compliant
• are popular or try to be popular with other children
• act coy, precocious, or dramatic in order to get attention
• are clowns and jokers (the more extroverted Twos), or quiet and shy (the more introverted Twos)

Twos as Parents

• are good listeners, love their children unconditionally, and are warm and encouraging (or suffer guilt if they aren't)
• are often playful with their children
• wonder: "Am I doing it right?" "Am I giving enough?" "Have I caused irreparable damage?"
• can become fiercely protective